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Authors: Eddie Izzard Quotes, Famous Eddie Izzard Quotes, Quotations
"Cake or death?" "Cake, please."
Eddie Izzard
Imagining how a Church of England Inquisition might have worked
Guns don't kill people. It's those bullets ripping through the body.
Eddie Izzard
How to survive boarding school. Do not express emotion, do not feel emotion, do not have emotion. If someone hits you, hit them back; if someone argues with you, argue back - never give an inch, never look vulnerable and you will survive.
Eddie Izzard
I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup.
Eddie Izzard
I wanna live 'til I die, no more, no less.
Eddie Izzard
I want to succeed in America where, unlike Britain, they do not regard ambition as being the same as eating babies.
Eddie Izzard
I'm a one-man idiot.
Eddie Izzard
That's how you build an empire. We stole countries with the cunning use of flags. Sail halfway around the world, stick a flag in. "I claim India for Britain." And they're going, "You can't claim us. We live here! There's five hundred million of us." "Do you have a flag?" "We don't need a flag, this is our country you bastard."
Eddie Izzard
Women have this vast variety of lingerie, stockings and tights and different patterns, and shoes, with different-sized heels, in red and black, and skirts - short, long, with slits - push-the-boob things … there's so much around in women's things that is erotic. While men have: shirt shirt shirt jumper shirt jumper jacket jumper shirt jacket trousers trousers shirt trousers flat shoes.
Eddie Izzard
You piss me off you Salmon... You're too expensive in restaurants.
Eddie Izzard
Eddie Izzard: British comedian and actor. Born 1962.


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