People
are always asking me when I'm going to retire. Why should I?
I've got it two ways - I'm still making movies, and I'm a senior
citizen, so I can see myself at half price.
George Burns |
People
ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my 87 birthday.
I tell them a paternity suit.
George Burns |
Retire?
I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the only one left.
George Burns
At age 90 |
Retirement
at 65 is ridiculous. When I was 65, I still had pimples.
George Burns |
Sex
at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.
George Burns |
Smartness
runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher
was in my class for five years.
George Burns |
The
secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good
ending, then having the two as close together as possible.
George Burns |
There
will always be a battle between the sexes because men and women
want different things. Men want women and women want men.
George Burns |
This
is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's
only read two.
George Burns |
Too
bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy
running taxicabs or cutting hair.
George Burns |