First you forget names, then you forget faces,
then you forget to pull your zipper up, then you forget to pull
your zipper down. Leo Rosenberg
Youre heard of the three ages of man: youth, middle age,
and youre looking wonderful! Cardinal Francis Spellman
You know youre old if they have discontinued your blood
type. Phyllis Diller
I still think of myself as I was 25 years ago. Then I look in
a mirror and see an old bastard and realize it's me. Dave Allen
As I grow older and older
And totter towards the tomb
I find that I care less and less
Who goes to bed with whom. Dorothy L. Sayers
My mother always used to say, The older you get, the better
you get, unless you're a banana. Betty White As Rose Nylund in The Golden Girls.
Age to women is like Kryptonite to Superman. Kathy Lette
Im at that age now where just putting my cigar in its
holder is a thrill. George Burns
I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my
age. George Burns
When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly
stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I
was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven
years. Mark Twain Attributed.
Women are as old as they feel and men are old when they
lose their feelings. Mae West
I delight in men over seventy. They always offer one the devotion
of a lifetime. I think seventy an ideal age for a man. Oscar Wilde A Woman of No Importance.
If you live to the age of a hundred, you have it made, because
very few people die past the age of a hundred. George Burns
Age is something that doesnt matter, unless you are a
cheese. Billy Burke
The great secret that all old people share is that you really
haven't changed in seventy or eighty years. Your body changes,
but you don't change at all. And that, of course, causes great
confusion. Doris Lessing
If you're in good shape age is just a number. Hugh Hefner- at 85
An aged man is but a paltry thing,
A tattered coat upon a stick, unless
Soul clap its hands and sing, and louder sing
For every tatter in its mortal dress. W. B. Yeats Sailing to Byzantium.
The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one
is young. Oscar Wilde The Picture of Dorian Gray.
Age is foolish and forgetful when it underestimates youth. J. K. Rowling Albus Dumbledore in Harry Potter and the
I grow old ... I grow old ...
I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled. T. S. Eliot The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock.
The complete life, the perfect pattern, includes old age as
well as youth and maturity. The beauty of the morning and the
radiance of noon are good, but it would be a very silly person
who drew the curtains and turned on the light in order to shut
out the tranquillity of the evening. Old age has its pleasures,
which, though different, are not less than the pleasures of
youth. W. Somerset Maugham The Summing Up.
I do not wish to grow old, to outlive my illusions. Only a short
respite from cares and sorrow, a brief time of flowers, and
music, and love, and laughter, and ecstatic tears. Anne Reeve Aldrich An Evening With Callender.
They only name things after you when you're dead or really old. George H. W. Bush
I've finally reached the age where my Wild Oats have turned
into All-Bran! Tom Wilson Ziggy.
This is old age! A slow and sure decay!
A tott'ring edifice, crusted with mould,
Failing in strength and beauty ev'rywhere!
Its vaults, and noble arches, choked with weeds!
Its casements dark, and chambers thick with dust
Its pillars bowed, or prostrate on the ground! C. B. Langston Old Age.
Old mens prayers for death are lying prayers, in which
they abuse old age and long extent of life. But when death draws
near, not one is willing to die, and age no longer is a burden
to them. Euripides Alcestis.
When life's summer grows to winter
And its roses fade and fall;
When in vain we try to hinder
Death's commissioned right to all;
When on white lips there's a last kiss
And we see her face no more,
Then it is to know what love is,
Waiting on a foreign shore. Edwin Leibfreed 'Tis Then We Know.
At 66, I have noticed a crop of new wrinkles above my knees.
Is this a woman thing? We need a road map for old age to prepare
us for such distressing surprises. Esther Rantzen
I advise you to go on living solely to enrage those who are
paying your annuities. It is the only pleasure I have left. Voltaire
None of us are so old are those who have outlived enthusiasm. Henry David Thoreau
I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper.
Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I
get up. Harry Hershfield
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory
goes, and I can't remember the other two ... Norman Wisdom
Oh to be seventy again. Georges Clemenceau On seeing a pretty girl on his 80th.
All would live long, but none would be old. Benjamin Franklin
The best thing about getting old is that all those things you
couldn't have when you were young you no longer want. L. S. McCandless
Don't let aging get you down. It's too hard to get back up. John Wagner
I'm getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left.
It is called hunting for your spectacles. Edward Grey
If wrinkles can be written upon our brows, let them not be written
on our hearts. James A. Garfield
Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. Mark Twain
You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because
you stop laughing. Michael Pritchard
No one grows old by living - only by losing interest in living. Marie Beynon Ray
A man is not old as long as he is seeking something. Jean Rostand
You've logged so many miles in the voyage of life that you've
been upgraded to first class. Evelyn Loeb
How nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt. Author Unknown