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Motivational - Love - Funny
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Topic: Wife Quotes - Famous Wife Quotes,
Quotations, Sayings about Wives |
Health for life to you,
A wife of your choice to you,
A child every year to you,
And the light of heaven after this world for you.
Irish Blessing
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
Oscar Wilde
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.
If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher...and that
is a good thing for any man.
Socrates
Item, I give unto my wife my second best bed, with the furniture.
William Shakespeare's will
A wife is essential to great longevity; she is the receptacle
of half a man's cares, and two-thirds of his ill-humor.
Charles Reade
A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf
husband.
Michel de Montaigne
The only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was
when the judge signed the divorce papers.
Woody Allen
I don't think a prostitute is more moral than a wife, but
they are doing the same thing.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh
Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if you were my husband, I'd
poison your tea.
Winston Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd
drink it.
In my house I'm the boss. My wife is just the decision maker.
Woody Allen
My wife and I tried to breakfast together, but we had to
stop or our marriage would have been wrecked.
Winston Churchill
You only require two things in life: your sanity and your
wife.
Tony Blair
I find her very hot.
Tony Blair
Responding to Glasgow radio presenter who
said "Scots guys find your wife quite hot".
A young bride is like a plucked flower; but a guilty wife
is like a flower that had been walked over.
Honore de Balzac
A husband who submits to his wife's yoke is justly held an
object of ridicule. A woman's influence ought to be entirely
concealed.
Honore De Balzac
My wife has a slight impediment in her speech - every now
and then she stops to breathe.
Jimmy Durante
Passion is the evil in adultery. If a man has no opportunity
of living with another man's wife, but if it is obvious for
some reason that he would like to do so, and would do so if
he could, he is no less guilty than if he was caught in the
act.
Saint Augustine
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man
in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.
Jane Austen
I am a very committed wife. And I should be committed too
- for being married so many times.
Elizabeth Taylor
Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.
Kin Hubbard
My wife's a hobby-horse.
William Shakespeare
The Winter's Tale
A man's mother is his misfortune, but his wife is his fault.
Walter Bagehot
He that hath wife and children hath given hostages to fortune;
for they are impediments to great enterprises, either of virtue
or mischief.
Francis Bacon
Spread love everywhere you go: first of all in your own house.
Give love to your children, to your wife or husband, to a
next door neighbor... Let no one ever come to you without
leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God's
kindness; kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness
in your smile, kindness in your warm greeting.
Mother Teresa
I already have a wife who is too much for me; she is my art,
and my works are my children.
Michelangelo
Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second
wife to his success.
Jim Backus
Norman [Eric Idle]: Is your wife a..."goer"...
eh? Know what I mean? Know what I mean? Nudge nudge. Nudge
nudge! Know what I mean? Say no more...Know what I mean?
Monty Python's Flying Circus
The sweetest women can be turned into a shrew by a man if
he excites her but does not fulfill her. To tame her and to
bring her back to sweetness he must make love to her and bring
forth her pleasures, and she will turn immediately as night
changes to day . . . She will then become a good wife, a good
companion, a good mother, and a good human being.
Haroun Al Makhzoumi
As I've explained to my wife many times, you have to kill
your wife or mistress to get on the front page of the papers.
Julian Barnes
All married women are not wives.
Japanese Proverb
I chose my wife, as she did her wedding gown, for qualities
that would wear well.
Oliver Goldsmith
He knows little who tells his wife all he knows.
Thomas Fuller
Teacher, tender comrade, wife, A fellow-farer true through
life.
Robert Louis Stevenson
She is but half a wife that is not, nor is capable of being,
a friend.
William Penn
Heaven will be no heaven to me if I do not meet my wife there.
Andrew Jackson
Wives are young men's mistresses, companions for middle age,
and old men's nurses.
Francis Bacon
My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to
persuade my wife to marry me.
Winston Churchill
Seek a wife in your own sphere.
Latin Proverb
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife
can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Lana Turner
When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new
car or a new wife.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh
Many marriages would be better if the husband and the wife
clearly understood that they are on the same side.
Zig Ziglar
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his
wife.
Groucho Marx
A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but
his mother the longest.
Irish Proverb
When a husband brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's
a reason.
Molly McGee
When a wife has a good husband it is easily seen in her face.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The nation needs to return to the colonial way of life, when
a wife was judged by the amount of wood she could split.
W. C. Fields
Let the wife make the husband glad to come home, and let
him make her sorry to see him leave.
Martin Luther
I want to die before my wife, and the reason is this: If
it is true that when you die, your soul goes up to judgment,
I don't want my wife up there ahead of me to tell them things.
Bill Cosby
He that displays too often his wife and his wallet is in
danger of having both of them borrowed.
Benjamin Franklin
A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers
that your wife will give you for free.
Author Unknown
My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects.
Les Dawson
One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive
wife.
Groucho Marx
A man's wife is his compromise with the illusion of his first
sweetheart.
George Jean Nathan
A little House well fill'd, a little Field well till'd, and
a little Wife well will'd, are great Riches.
Benjamin Franklin
Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about
marriage: the wife is in charge.
Bill Cosby
My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years
and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider
divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.
Jack Benny
If a politician isn't doing it to his wife , then he's doing
it to his country.
Amy Grant
This is the way to kill a wife with kindness.
William Shakespeare
The Taming of the Shrew
Don't eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them.
Homer Simpson
To aliens who abducted Simpson family.
If any of you would bring judgment the unfaithful wife,
Let him also weight the heart of her husband in scales, and
measure his soul with measurements.
Kahlil Gibran
No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or
mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed.
Harold Macmillan
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife.
Bible
Exodus
Blessed is the man that hath a virtuous wife, for the number
of his days shall be double.
Bible
Ecclesiasticus
Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath
and she'd come in and sink my boats.
Woody Allen
I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I
started out with twenty-eight years ago.
Will Rogers
What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee
and he told me about the butcher and my wife.
Rodney Dangerfield |
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