Have
you ever noticed that good people sleep better, but bad people
seem to have more fun when they're awake?
Woody Allen |
It
is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light and certainly
not desirable, as ones hat keeps falling off...
Woody Allen |
I
failed to make the chess team because of my height.
Woody Allen |
I
believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between
five, it's fantastic.
Woody Allen |
I'm
very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed,
sold me this watch.
Woody Allen |
I
don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear
in my crib.
Woody Allen |
I
sold the memoirs of my sex life to a publisher - they are going
to make a board game out of it.
Woody Allen |
Basically
my wife was immature. I'd be at home in my bath and she'd come
in and sink my boats.
Woody Allen |
If
there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Warren Beatty's
fingertips.
Woody Allen |
The
only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the
judge signed the divorce papers.
Woody Allen |