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Authors: Woody Allen Quotes, Funny Woody Allen Quotes, Famous Sayings
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Have you ever noticed that good people sleep better, but bad people seem to have more fun when they're awake?
Woody Allen
It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light and certainly not desirable, as ones hat keeps falling off...
Woody Allen
I failed to make the chess team because of my height.
Woody Allen
I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic.
Woody Allen
I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
Woody Allen
I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.
Woody Allen
I sold the memoirs of my sex life to a publisher - they are going to make a board game out of it.
Woody Allen
Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in my bath and she'd come in and sink my boats.
Woody Allen
If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Warren Beatty's fingertips.
Woody Allen
The only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers.
Woody Allen
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Woody Allen: American movie director, writer, actor. Born 1935.



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