American couples have gone to such lengths to avoid the interference of in-laws that they have to pay marriage counselors to interfere between them. – Florence King
The witty woman is a tragic figure in American life. Wit destroys eroticism and eroticism destroys wit, so women must choose between taking lovers and taking no prisoners. – Florence King
To achieve the very pinnacle of good taste, the neoclassicists wrote their plays entirely in alexandrine verse, a rarefied meter that is uniquely tailored to the French language and fits no other. – Florence King
People are so busy dreaming the American Dream, fantasizing about what they could be or have a right to be, that they’re all asleep at the switch. Consequently we are living in the Age of Human Error. – Florence King
I’d rather rot on my own floor than be found by a bunch of bingo players in a nursing home. – Florence King
In social matters, pointless conventions are not merely the bee sting of etiquette, but the snake bite of moral order. – Florence King
He travels fastest who travels alone, and that goes double for she. Real feminism is spinsterhood. – Florence King
Americans worship creativity the way they worship physical beauty – as a way of enjoying elitism without guilt: God did it. – Florence King
Writers, not psychiatrists, are the true interpreters of the human mind and heart, and we have been at it for a very long time. – Florence King
Time has lost all meaning in that nightmare alley of the Western world known as the American mind. – Florence King
Now the only thing I miss about sex is the cigarette afterward. Next to the first one in the morning, it’s the best one of all. It tasted so good that even if I had been frigid I would have pretended otherwise just to be able to smoke it. – Florence King
Showing up at school already able to read is like showing up at the undertaker’s already embalmed: people start worrying about being put out of their jobs. – Florence King
