I was the youngest of three brothers by five years, so I spent most of my childhood playing alone, being Zorro or some other superhero, doing Lego, watching telly and riding my bike. – Robert Webb
Slow, skinny, and an utter countryside coward: I lived in dread of nettles, spiders, and the very sound of a wasp. As a victim, I was beneath the dignity of the bullies in my year but fair game to the ones in the year below. – Robert Webb
It was quite an honour when ‘New Woman’ magazine voted me 88th sexiest man in the world. I think I was one in front of David Cameron. – Robert Webb
I snootily say I can’t take too many dramatic parts, as it’s taking work from actors who aren’t funny. – Robert Webb
Missing out an apostrophe or two does not make you an idiot. But equating party allegiance with nationhood certainly makes you a thug. And thugs don’t often notice that they’re thugs, usually because they’re also idiots. – Robert Webb
My first proper kiss was from Cara Shucksmith when I was 13 or 14 at her birthday party. – Robert Webb
I’m knackered. I’m knackered all the time. My stupid, tiny children wake me up at 5:48 A.M. every single morning. – Robert Webb
I’m troubled by how much I like Rowan Williams. I think it reveals character flaws in myself that I’d rather not think about. The softly spoken soon-to-be-former Archbishop of Canterbury is my secret crush, my weird pash, and my guilty pleasure. – Robert Webb
My parents’ marriage was already shaky when I came along. They split up when I was five, and I didn’t see Dad all that often after that – four or five times a year. – Robert Webb
I get recognised a fair bit. It goes up when ‘Peep Show’ or the sketch show is on the telly or when we’re doing loads of interviews. – Robert Webb
I think of myself as naturally idle. The trouble is, the ‘nothing’ that I do every day is not really nothing. I potter. I muck about with emails, I make coffee, I fiddle with my computer to make sure that the book I haven’t started writing is perfectly synced across all platforms and devices. – Robert Webb
Feminism isn’t about hating men. It’s about challenging the absurd gender distinctions that boys and girls learn from childhood and carry into their adult lives. – Robert Webb
My mother died when I was 17, and I moved in with my dad to make a 12-month pig’s ear of retaking my A-levels. – Robert Webb
There was a lot of terrible, terrible comedy in the seventies along with ‘Fawlty Towers.’ It’s easy to forget. – Robert Webb
The way people imagine their political leaders is, like it or not, an important factor in how they decide to vote and, indeed, whether they vote at all. – Robert Webb
